Happy Birthday Harry... Part One

Any of my Irkutsk friends can tell you that when your child's birthday rolls around, you can't help but be bombarded with questions you ask yourself all day long. For me, I'd spend the time wondering what Harry was doing, what he was doing to celebrate, whether he was celebrating at all, what he was eating, was it a special meal, etc. etc. etc. Because of the 13 hour time difference, anytime between 7:00 the nite before his birthday until roughly 9 a.m on his birthday, I couldn't escape the questions. I'd be up half the nite, knowing he was 1/2 a world away on his birthday and I was clueless as to what he was up to.

Weeks or months in advance I'd make arrangements to have gifts mailed to him - or - send money to our incredible friend Irina, and ask her to pick things up for him and his group. And every year Irina would visit him for his birthday, bearing gifts, treats for him and his group, and often pictures of us to update his photo book. Within a week or so of his birthday, she'd email me an account of her visit, always careful to describe the day in detail - knowing full well we'd be picturing it in our minds as we read and re-read the email. And always, there were pictures of him and their visit. Of course it was always bittersweet. We loved the update and the email, but our hearts were always heavy, knowing we had just missed yet another birthday. I dug out some of those emails from Irina:

From 2006:

Dear Judy, Mike and Skip,

Hope all of you are well! My congratulations to all your family! Your youngest boy is already 2 today. He's growing well, he is eager to become as strong and smart as his elder brother Skip. When I cam to his group in the morning, all the kids were getting ready to have their big meal of soup, some vegetables and juice. The caregiver took Harry to change his clothes, and he was crying all the time, as he understood that there was someone who wanted to take him somewhere and what was worse, he could miss his meal. I asked the caregiver to let him eat, and he stopped crying at once.

All the kids were looking at the BIG CAKE, decorated with berries I brought. The caregivers said they would get this treat after their nap time, but they gave them candies and they were almost satisfied. Almost, because they could see that what they were given was just a little part of the bag lying on the table. When Harry was done, he went to the play room, where he was very serious for a while, but his eyes sparkled when I first gave him another delicious candy, and then showed him a big bright box. He was interested to see what was inside of it, he helped me to open the box and got the toys from it. He examined the train and the cars with animals. He liked the train most of all, especially the way it sounded. At first he could not press strong enough to make it work, and I taught him to step on the definite part, he did it for some time, then understood the process, and started to press it with his hands. So it was fun to watch him thinking. When he was done with the train he played a bit with cars and animals, throwing them into the air and then trying to stick them to the right place. Then he turned to the box, which I supposed would be the first thing to explore, as it seems to me that very often kids enjoy packages more. All the pieces of paper which were inside were put into the pockets, none was lost.

I believe he was happy to have all the attention he was paid to. He wanted to be serious, but from time to time there was his splendid smile on the face. I hugged him and kissed him, saying that his parents and brother are waiting for him, and will come to get him home as soon as it possible. He was very active and it was very difficult to take his pictures, so I hope you will enjoy the ones I managed to take.

I talked to the caregiver about his development, she said, he's doing OK. At present he knows some shape of the objects, some colors, he likes building towers and bridges, playing with cups. He is very active, enjoys running about. He knows the names of the kids and the caregivers. He likes to be helpful, like some days ago he helped the little girl from his group to put on tights, and when the caregiver praised him he was very proud.

As for is health, he does not have any serious problems, just some allergy on his cheeks. His measurements are: height-81 cm, weight – 11.500 kg.

Close for now, Irina

And 2007:

We visited Harry on his birthday and spent almost half a day with him. He was very happy! He recognizes me every time I come to him, so he understands that I'm a bit special as I always come with candies and gifts for him and other kids.

He is very, very talkative, as I've told you before he comments everything he does and it's interesting to watch him. I came to Harry just after their nap time, so when I came into the bedroom, he was sitting on the floor and counting kid's clothes. He says he a great helper for the caregivers and always does what they ask him.

When everything was counted we went to the playroom where the kids started to get dresses, as you understand all kids wanted me to help them, they queued for that and Harry was the first one in the line. I brought delicious marsh-mallow and a cake for kids, the caregivers divided them among all the kids telling that these are gifts from Harry's parents. Harry was very proud to treat everybody.

After the lunch, the caregiver made children to sing and dance in a ring. There is a special song for that occasion here, while Harry was standing in the middle and at the end he chose a girl to dance with. Both times he danced with the same girl. Then we started playing with different toys: cars, dolls, flowers, tigers. He showed me everything he could do. Then we decided to have a rest and to watch the pictures I've brought for him.

The first picture was of you (Judy) sitting in the boat, and though your face can't be seen very well Harry recognized you at once, pointing at the picture and saying "Mama". I was really impressed. Then he saw his brother and said "It's a boy", but when I reminded him the name "Skip", I believe it seemed familiar for him, as he pronounced it very clearly. So when he saw Skip in other pictures he called him only Skip and not a boy. Of course, he liked Sabaka. But at first he decided it was crying, and started patting it saying "Don't cry". But I told him that Sabaka is happy to know that today it's Harry's birthday and he wants to kiss him, he laughed a lot. The caregiver will put all the pictures into his photo album and they will watch it regularly.

After that we went for a walk, where I gave all the kids sand box sets, they were all happy to play with them, while Harry was glad to have another big truck from his family which he can fill with sand. We played with trucks, then bowling, then read a book, then just ran. So when it was time for me to go – he didn't like it. But I told him I would visit him again to say hello from Skip and his parents as soon as possible. That was the day.

Best wishes,
Irina

Of course THIS YEAR, was so very different for us. For the first time, we would be with him on his birthday! It was such a joy to just go shopping for his gifts, knowing this time we'd give them to Harry ourselves! And the joy didn't end there. We savored each little preparation we made: wrapping his gifts, baking his cake, filling his balloons with helium, and picking out a card - things that are normally just items on a To-Do list that precedes any birthday celebration - were steps. Steps towards a birthday celebration we waited nearly 5 years to host.

And celebrate, we did...